Top Questions to Ask When Choosing a Therapist to Find the Right Fit

Making the decision to participate in therapy is typically not one we come to lightly. So, kudos to you for taking this first step. Even when we know that therapy could help us cope better with the life problems we are facing, choosing a therapist can still be a bit intimidating. We may not even know how we should begin the search.

Therapy is deep work, and at times, it can even be hard work. Therapy may involve sharing our innermost secrets and revisiting profound emotional wounds. It is for reasons such as these that I highly encourage doing some serious vetting of any potential therapists. As a licensed psychologist and someone who has participated in my own therapy, I would like to offer some tips to make the process of choosing a therapist less difficult.

It all starts with asking some key questions. First, are a set of questions that I recommend asking yourself before you even make your first visit to an online directory of potential therapists. Starting with introspection will help inform the next steps of the process, which is all about questions to ask a new therapist.

Top questions to ask yourself before choosing a therapist

The first set of suggested questions are designed to help you gain clarity about your goals and preferences for therapy. Being clear about these two areas will help you to narrow down the pool of potential therapists and help you know what to ask them before scheduling your first full therapy appointment.

Keep reading for the top questions to ask yourself on your search for the right fit therapist.

Why are you considering therapy at this time?

The first question area is all about asking yourself why you are considering therapy at this particular time in your life. This is an opportunity to get really clear about what you want to work on in your therapy sessions. Do you need help reducing your level of stress or anxiety? Are you having difficulty adjusting to an unexpected change in your life? Each of us will have our own unique struggles for which we are considering therapy.

It is important to distinctly identify in which life area you are seeking help because once you start the search, you will find that there are many different concerns, sometimes called “issues” with which a psychotherapist can help. Being clear about this area for yourself will help you to narrow down your search when choosing a therapist. We will explore this area in more depth later, but most online therapist directories will have drop-down menus or other filters that allow you to search for a counselor by a specific area of concern.

What do you hope to get out of participating in therapy?

Once you have identified why you are considering therapy as an option to help with current life struggles, it is important to reflect on what you hope to achieve as a result of participating in therapy. Sometimes the answer to this question is straightforward. For example, if we are feeling overwhelmed and stressed out, then we may just want to have a lower stress level as a goal for therapy. Human behavior and the problems we experience are complex though, so the answer to this question is not always as clear. If an answer to this question does not immediately come to you, then it may be helpful to imagine how your life might be different as a result of participating in therapy.

Gaining clarity on what you hope to get out of therapy is helpful when choosing a therapist for a couple reasons. First, therapists will usually have information in their online therapy directory listings or psychotherapy website about the changes they have helped previous therapy clients make. Bear in mind though that these will be general examples because counselors will never reveal personal details about past clients. Therapy clients have a right to privacy and confidentiality, so you should never see any testimonial type information that would connect to a person’s identity.

Now for the other reason that it is important to be clear about what you hope to get out of therapy early in your search for the right therapist. Chances are high that you will be asked by any potential therapists during a free consultation or at the first full appointment what goals you are hoping to achieve through counseling. So, it can be helpful to give some consideration to this meaningful topic ahead of time.

How would you prefer to pay for your therapy sessions?

The next question to consider is how you would prefer to pay for your therapy sessions. The main decision here is likely going to be either self-pay or to use one’s health insurance benefits. There are advantages and disadvantages to both options. Giving deliberation to how you would prefer to pay for therapy helps you streamline your therapist search efforts. If you know you want to use health insurance, you can make the process a lot easier by starting the therapist search with your health insurance directory for counselors and psychologists offering therapy who also accept your health insurance. It can be quite disappointing to go to an online therapist directory and find the perfect therapist only to learn that the counselor does not accept your health insurance. Out of network benefits may be an option if the therapist with whom you’re interested in seeing does not accept your health insurance plan.  

Many people prefer to pay for therapy sessions out of pocket due to concerns involving privacy and flexibility. For example, it is one thing to share your innermost secrets with a professional psychologist and another thing altogether to get a phone call from health insurance customer service representative who references a sensitive mental health diagnosis. To use health insurance benefits to help pay for therapy, one must have a qualifying mental health disorder. This requirement is unfortunate because so much personal growth can occur in therapy even for people who do not have a mental illness. There may also be caps on how many therapy sessions one can have while using health insurance benefits to help pay for therapy. For people who find it important to participate in therapy without such limitations, the private pay/self-pay option may be the better payment choice for counseling.       

If cost is an issue, it may be helpful to know that some counselors offer pro bono sessions (i.e., at no cost to the client as a form of giving back to the community). Some psychotherapists may offer reduced rates for students. There are also organizations that specialize in providing reduced fee or sliding scale payment options for psychotherapy. There may be an application process to qualify for counseling at a reduced rate.

What aspects of the therapist’s qualifications, credentials, and professional experience matter the most to you when choosing a therapist?

The next question is about any preferences you may have regarding therapist qualifications, credentials, and professional experience. For example, there are different licensure types to consider. Therapist licensure types will vary by state and country, but common licensure types for therapists include the following: licensed psychologist, licensed mental health counselor, or licensed clinical social worker. You will also want to ask yourself if your therapist’s education, training, and time in the field is important to you.   

While credentials and professional experience can give us a good idea of a therapist’s areas of expertise, there is something called the therapeutic alliance that is also essential. The therapeutic alliance is the fit between the counselor and the client. Research in the field of psychology has repeatedly shown that the therapeutic alliance is what accounts for the most positive outcomes from psychotherapy. So, in addition to knowing that your therapist has a solid professional background, how you connect with the therapist is also key.

Are there any personal characteristics that may make a therapist a better fit for you?

Given the unique individual histories we all have, personal characteristics of a therapist may impact the level of fit. Important therapist characteristics to consider include gender identity, race, ethnicity, sexual orientation, and religious or spiritual practices. It may be important to us that we have certain characteristics in common with the therapist to help us feel confident that the therapist will get us. Bear in mind though that therapists go through rigorous training to develop empathy for therapy clients even in the absence of shared lived experiences. Some therapists choose to disclose relevant personal information about themselves, but other therapists may prefer to keep most personal information private. Where a therapist falls on the continuum of sharing relevant personal information about themselves is often related to their theoretical approach to psychotherapy.   

Is there a certain type of therapy approach that you think would work best for you?

There are numerous approaches to psychotherapy ranging from general to very specific types of treatment. While someone looking to start therapy need not familiarize oneself with every possible theoretical orientation a potential therapist may have, it can be helpful to consider any preferences for how the therapist will help you get to your goals. Some approaches are mostly supportive such as the person-centered or humanistic theoretical orientations. Other therapy styles involve uncovering the past and gaining insight into one’s patterns as found in psychodynamic therapy. Yet other types of therapy involve looking at the impact of one’s thoughts on feelings and behavior, which is the focus of cognitive behavioral therapy.    

What are your preferences for the location of your therapy sessions?

When it comes to therapy, sessions can be at the therapist’s office or online. Some therapists make house calls, but that service is rare. Therapists differ on which location options they offer, so it is wise to think about your preferences for where your therapy sessions will occur. Do you like the idea of seeing your therapist in an office building close to where you work? Or, would you prefer to log in to a therapy session from the privacy of your own home in comfy yoga pants and slippers? Being clear about therapy location preferences will help you simplify the search for the right fit therapist.    

Do you have any preferences or limitations regarding scheduling for your therapy sessions?

Another question to ask yourself when choosing a therapist is when you would prefer (or in some cases need) to meet for your therapy sessions. Would you prefer to start your day fresh with a morning therapy appointment or would it make more sense to meet for therapy later in the day? You may also have time constraints regarding your availability for therapy sessions such as your work schedule or childcare hours. You want to make sure your schedule will fit with when the therapist has office hours.

Do you have any preferences about mental health treatment in addition to therapy?

As you prepare to find the right fit therapist, ask yourself how you feel about other treatment options for your concerns such as medication. In some situations, therapists may recommend their clients see a psychiatrist for a medication evaluation to help with the issues bringing them to therapy. So, it is wise to give some consideration to your thoughts and feelings about treatment options that may go along side therapy.  

Putting it all together: one step closer to choosing a therapist

Now that you have explored these important questions about your goals and preferences for therapy, you are ready to begin the next phase of your search for the right fit therapist. It is time to venture out to the online therapist directory type that makes the most sense for you (e.g., a general online directory like Psychology Today, your health insurance directory, a sliding scale directory, or an organization in your geographic area that gets free therapy to people experiencing a hardship). Your thoughtful introspection on the above questions will make the next steps of searching for and communicating with potential therapists so much easier.

Top questions to ask a new therapist

Once you visit the online therapist directory that makes the most sense for you, you can experiment with the search and filter options to find potential therapists that meet the preferences you have recognized as being significant to you. Some questions for the potential therapists can be quickly answered by reviewing the information provided in online therapy directory listings or on therapist websites. Answers to other questions may not be readily available online, but can certainly be asked in your communication with therapists whom you are interested in seeing.

Keep reading for the top questions to ask potential therapists.

Does the therapist offer a complimentary consultation to help potential clients with choosing a therapist?

Many therapists offer a brief and complimentary consultation for people who are interested in working with them in therapy. These complimentary consultations allow you a window of time to ask important questions to potential therapists and to get a better idea about therapeutic fit. If you do not see the complimentary consultation option listed online for a potential therapist, there is absolutely no harm in asking if one is offered. Not every therapist offers this service though. If they do not offer a complimentary consultation, they will typically have a different process for making a beginning determination about therapeutic fit.

What are the therapist’s qualifications, credentials, and professional experience?

Information on the potential therapist’s qualifications, credentials, and professional experience will typically be included in online therapy directory listings or on therapist websites. If you do not see the information readily available, it is your right to inquire about these areas with any counseling professional.

What experience does the potential therapist have with your area of concern?

A general term for your area of concern may be available online and can help you narrow down the search for a potential therapist. While your “issue” for seeking therapy may be provided online, it is also helpful to hear therapists describe in their own words how they have helped other people with concerns similar to yours.  

Questions to ask a therapist: What is their approach to helping people through psychotherapy?

The answer to this question will help you learn more the therapist’s theoretical orientation to therapy. This information is often readily available online and may be described using any of the following terms: mode of therapy, type of therapy, therapy style, or therapy approach. Hearing directly from a potential therapist about how a certain therapy modality looks in actual practice helps with understanding goodness of fit.  

Does the therapist include religious or spiritual topics in their approach to therapy?

This question connects to the introspection you were encouraged to do on any personal characteristics that may make a therapist a better fit for you. For some people, having a therapist who integrates faith into counseling is a must. For others, it would be unwelcomed. Whatever your preference, therapists are aware of and respect religious differences. Bear in mind that some therapists specialize in faith-based counseling.  

What is the process like for starting therapy with them?

Therapists will vary in how they handle the process of starting therapy with them. Some therapists dive right into therapy whereas others will first conduct a therapy assessment appointment. If the therapist does not spell out their process for starting therapy with them on a website or in the consultation, then it is absolutely fine to ask so you know what to expect.

How does the therapist set goals for therapy? How is progress on therapy goals measured?

This is another area where therapists will have different styles as there are any many effective ways of setting therapy goals and measuring progress. Some therapists focus on ongoing collaboration and interactive feedback while other will collect data on progress by way of periodic questionnaires. What’s important here is to pay attention to how you feel about the approach.

Does the therapist offer in person or online therapy sessions?

This information is usually provided in online therapy directory listings or on therapist websites, but be sure to ask early on if the location of therapy sessions is not readily available. For online psychotherapy, be sure to ask about the security of their virtual therapy sessions.

What are the therapist’s office hours?

Goodness of fit involves some rather practical and logistical matters, too. You want to make sure that your schedule fits with the times the therapist is available.

Questions to ask a therapist during consultation: How long does therapy typically take?

This question refers to how long each therapy session lasts as well as how many therapy sessions to expect in total. The therapeutic hour runs anywhere from 45 minutes to one hour. There are some types of therapy that require longer sessions. The number of sessions varies by each individual and is typically determined by progress on identified goals for therapy.   

How to interview a therapist: What is the therapist’s stance on medications in addition to therapy?

This question may not be readily available in online therapy directory listings or on therapist websites so be sure to ask this question early on in communication with a potential therapist, especially if you have strong feelings about this topic. 

How to interview a therapist: How much does therapy cost and how does the therapist handle billing?

Some therapists will have the rates for their therapy services included on their websites or in directory listings, but in some cases, you may need to contact their office for more information. As relevant, you will want to ask about using health insurance, out of network benefits, or sliding scale options. If you’re planning to use out of network benefits, be sure to ask if they provide a statement you can use for reimbursement purposes. It is also smart to ask about any fees including late cancellations or no shows.

Questions to ask therapist during consultation: Anything else that is still unclear or that is important to you when choosing a therapist

While the list of top questions for potential therapists is quite comprehensive, it is always possible that other matters may be of importance to you before starting therapy. You have the right to ask whatever questions help you make an informed decision about working with a potential therapist. Professional psychotherapists are just as concerned about a good fit for therapy as are you and will welcome your questions.

Now, one final question for you…

Are you ready to take the next step in the process of choosing a therapist?

Finding the right fit therapist is an important process, but it does not have to be overwhelming. By breaking it down and giving careful consideration to your goals and preferences for therapy, your therapist search will have a clear direction. When you make your choice about who to see for therapy, you can also feel confident that your decision was well informed. 

Dr. Jennifer McManus is a licensed psychologist in private practice in Florida. She specializes in psychotherapy for women who want help with stress, anxiety, professional burnout, and breakups. You can learn more about her practice at www.drjennifermcmanus.com, by emailing, or by calling the office at 866-706-3665. And, yes, Dr. McManus offers a complimentary consultation and would be delighted to answer your questions about working with her!